10) Ken & Ryu
Ok…seriously. These guys are martial arts expert right? Lists and lists of combos to select from? THEN WHY THE HELL DOES THE AI DECIDE TO USE ONLY TWO MOVES!? Let’s see, does this ring a bell?
“hadouken, shoryuken, hadouken, shoryuken, hadouken, shoryuken, hadouken, shoryuken”
Yes…the most annoying phrase to ever come out of a fighting game. Think the AI or your friends will not throw this trick at you? You will have thought wrong. Any fan of the Street fighter series will understand why these two made the list…
9) Peppy
Peppy, let me just say this…I will do a barrel roll when I damn well please...that is all.
8) Shao Kahn
We’ve all been there…last fight…top of the latter...round 1…FIGHT! Subsequently after those words you begin to get pummeled by a green hammer that appears out of nowhere, hits that take wayyyy too much of your life bar and knock you clear across the screen, and if that’s not enough, he will tell you quite literally “You Suck”. MK fans love playing as him…not so much playing against him. Any character that you can unleash your best combo on and it barely moves his own life bar down deserves a spot here.
7) Big Bertha
I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I have rage quit a game due to being swallowed whole by this big fish. In Super Mario 3, this character even has its own level that submerses to you had no choice but to get close to it. Just stay out the water right? NO! BECAUSE THIS FISH WILL JUMP OUT OF THE WATER AND EAT YOU FASTER THAN YOU CAN SAY “AW DAMNIT NOT AGAIN!” .
6) The Adoring Fan
You defeated everyone in the Arena…sweet right? You get some gold, a new title, and even your own adoring fan that will follow you wherever you go…and I mean WHEREVER you go. There is a section on Youtube devoted to ways people have killed off this useless character. The amount of times I have fast traveled and forgot about him tailing me only to end up in a dark cave and sleeping or something, waking up to a bright torch in my face and him standing there with that stupid grin lands him at the #6 spot.
5) Otacon
“Snake? SNAKE? SNAAAAAAAAAAKKKEEEEEEE!?!?!?!?” …What a way to go. You’re dead but probably still have a functioning auditory system, and the last words you will ever hear is this Bozo yelling in your ear. From day one fans have had a love hate relationship with this character…mind just happened to land on the hate side. I’m sorry if any Otacon fans read this and are upset by my choice to put in on the list. I just never could trust someone who pees themselves when scared.
4) Slippy toad
How many times must we save your life? Really…how many? If you’re like me, you don’t mind this little amphibian getting shot down in battle, so long as it means you will not have to hear his voice the rest of the level.
3) Ashley Graham
Speaking of saving lives, this chick literally only made the list because I got tired of saving hers. Cultists, El Gigante, an angry midget dressed as Napoleon…everyone wants her dead…and at a certain point, you will too. The highlight of the game is a tossup between trying to peek up skirt when she climbs a latter, and telling her to hop in a dumpster. You even get the chance to play as Ashley in RE4 for a short time. However, don’t expect her to be useful…no guns, punches, anything. You can throw an oil lantern to incinerate your enemies…other than that, it’s a run and dodge play style that you’re more than excited about leaving behind once it’s all said and done.
2) Navi
You knew this was going to happen. Zelda fans forever will loathe this little fairy for her constant pestilence and annoying shouts. “HEY!” “LOOK!” LISTEN!” “OVER HERE!”. It’s beyond annoying. It’s still a shame to me that Nintendo has never added the flyswatter to Link’s inventory…I mean, imagine holding the Wii-mote and swinging crazily all over the place just in hopes you bat that little talk box with wings to the ground. I see an opportunity here Nintendo…capitalize on it and give the fans what they really want. Navi is nothing a can of Raid wouldn’t fix.
1) Princess Peach
Getting kidnapped is something that happens to a princess. However, by the 30th time you can no longer make excuses for this blonde moron. How many times must you get kidnapped before you make the executive decision to beef up castle security? Give Toad an assault rifle, SOMETHING! You’re in possession of several hundred servants (granted they’re only like 3ft tall), and we can’t arm them with ANYTHING? Princess Peach, as far as I'm concerned...you can stay gone. It's time to cut your losses Mario...let King Koopa take the bimbo. Besides, we all know Daisey is way hotter.
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